Dedicated To My Little Big Man

dearest son,

today, you turned 3 years old.

there is no one in this world that can melt my heart as quickly as you. that can turn my anger to laughter, sadness to joy, irritation to cheer in a matter of seconds just by a few words from your husky voice.

i’ll be honest … when you were in my belly, i used to worry that i wouldn’t be able to love you as much as your sister.  Continue reading


Can You Love Your Children Equally?

growing up the eldest of three kids, our parents raised us very differently.

i was the the guinea pig, so i got all sorts of f**cked up.
my younger sister witnessed the insane trouble i got in, turned out the exact opposite and was the perfect child.
by the time my brother was born 10 years after me, my parents basically didn’t care – his diaper didn’t get changed until it was so heavy, the crotch part was touching the ground.

i vowed that as a parent, i’d be completely fair, never compare my kids, love them equally, treat them the same. as soon as i became a parent for the second time, i realized what an idealistic naive idiot i was.

Continue reading

Random Musings: Chewbacca Momma, College Sippy Cups, Bubonic Plague

some lame & inane musings from the past week:

  • sooooo, why exactly do we have daylight savings again?
  • you know you’re getting old when you’re out with your friends and by 11 pm, all you can think about is getting out of your uncomfortable clothes and shoes, washing your face, taking out your contacts, pulling your hair in a scrunchie bun, and putting on your home uniform of ugly tshirt and uglier sweats. ahhhh that sounds like a little bit of heaven!
  • *sigh* it’s tough always having to be so right. Continue reading

You Got Some ‘Splaining To Do

it’s been a couple months since my last post – let me explain.

i started what i thought was my dream and last job until retirement back in may. it was with a company that developed products i truly believed in. the people were young, smart and funny. i felt like i fit from a personality and chemistry stand point. before i even stepped foot into the office my first day, i knew i was going to work long hours, the job was going to be challenging, and i was going to be stretched to the limit … and i was genuinely excited to take the next big step in my career.

what i didn’t anticipate was the incredible toll it was going to take on me and more importantly, my family.

Continue reading

I’m Baaaaaaaaaack … For Now.

it’s been quite a while since i’ve last posted.

i really thought i could do it all: work 12+ hours a day, be an engaged present mom & wife, clean the house, do the laundry, be the family social secretary, and blog.  do i blame it on lack of hours, exhaustion, work?  no … it’s about priorities and having some safeguards in place to ensure i don’t go freaking crazy, or rather, crazier. Continue reading

Parenthood, Guilty As Charged

to say it’s been insane around my household is a bit of an understatement.

both my husband and i are professional procrastinators so we’ve been putting off packing our house until the absolute last minute. one of us should be pushing the other but it’s more like:

“uggggh i don’t want to pack!”
“should we not pack?”
“naaah, let’s watch duck dynasty.”

Continue reading

What Mother’s Day Means To Me: It’s Not About Bling or Brunch

everything my mom told me when when i was younger – no matter how naggy and annoying and repetitive and antiquated it sounded at the time – came true, damnit.

  • “don’t tan your face, you look like a refugee” – i slathered baby oil on my face and body, laid out in the 100+ degree san fernando valley sun and now my face is paying for it with my lovely sunspots and wrinkles.
  • “why do you want to grow up so fast? being young is the best” – ahhh to go back and relive my youth dressed in zcav’s, flojos, baby t’s, silver cross leather necklaces, toni home perms, 6″ aquanetted bangs.
  • “you cause me so much heartache, i hope you have a daughter just like yourself one day” – please please please do not let this come true. Continue reading